FightFM.com

Has anyone ever told you that saying “Yes” can be hazardous to your health?

If not, Dr. Edward T. Creagan, an oncologist with the famed Mayo Clinic, is telling you so now. Earlier this week the Mayo Clinic’s online Stress Blog featured an article by Dr. Creagan entitled “Learning To Say No Crucial To Survival.” That’s right, saying “no” is not just okay, it is vital to your health and wellbeing.

With the bewildering pace of technology and with the globalization of commerce, events and circumstances around the world can impact each of us in a second. So what can we do from a practical perspective to keep us focused and on task? For many of us, it is the acknowledgment that yes, it is OK to take care of ourselves. Yes, it is OK to get a good night’s sleep. Yes, it is OK to turn down that business luncheon or that early morning meeting and simply say, “Thank you, but this will not work with my schedule.”

We are clearly hearing very loudly that if we continue to give and do not replenish our minds, bodies, and souls our tank will be dry, the reservoir of energy runs out and there is nothing left.

If living with fibromyalgia teaches us one thing, it’s how to prioritize. As people who live with a serious limitation on the amount of energy available to us on a daily basis, we have no choice but to pick and choose which tasks and issues we will spend that energy on. Not only is it vital that we prioritize the demands on us; we must also save enough energy for our bodies to heal and replace the energy we spend during each day.

Those who are fortunate enough to be healthy may not always understand just how important conserving our energy can be, and that can make it particularly difficult for us to decline a request. This is one of the reasons why education about fibromyalgia is so important. But you can’t help to educate others until you have learned to accept and even appreciate your own reality. You may not be able to accept every request or offer that comes your way, even if you would like to, but neither can anyone else. Although energy conservation is particularly important for people living with an illness, it is a skill that everyone must learn at some point in order to handle the stress that comes along with daily life. We just learn it a little better than most. Dr. Creagan’s article reminds us that we are not so different from the rest of the world, and in fact our illness has forced us to develop necessary skills that we otherwise might not have learned. Listen to the people around you and chances are good that you will sometimes hear them complaining about how they never have enough time or energy. Then smile, knowing that you can teach your friends a thing or two about managing priorities!

Click here for more about learning how to say “No”

How To Choose A Doctor:

A Guide For Fibromyalgia Patients

One of the most difficult decisions a fibromyalgia (FM) patient will face is finding the right doctor. There is certainly no shortage of doctors available, but the rarity of finding a doctor who is caring, competent, and specifically knowledgeable about FM leaves many patients feeling frustrated or even hopeless about the prospect of finding a good physician. Even when they do find someone who meets their needs, there can be difficulties with insurance companies, the cost of treatments, or even transportation to and from appointments. In the long run, however, the selection of the right doctor is a major factor in maximizing a fibromyalgia patient’s quality of life; the choice should not be made hastily. FM is a complicated, long-term condition which requires special training and skills on the part of the physician; treatment should not be left in the hands of your average family practice or primary care physician.

Following is a list of things to consider when choosing a doctor to diagnose and treat FM. You can write down the tips that are helpful to you or the questions you want to remember to ask your doctor – whatever helps you to take an active role in your own health and treatment. Remember, your doctor is your best link to the medical community and should be one of your greatest advocates in the fight against FM, so take your time and find the right doctor for you!

Tips for finding the right doctor to treat your fibromyalgia:

• Take an active role in your own treatment. Your health and wellbeing are too important to leave up to someone else; educate yourself on your condition and learn about the most common treatment options so that you will have a basis on which to evaluate your doctors’ recommendations. (This is also a major step in helping you to regain control over your own life, especially if you are experiencing symptoms of depression such as feelings of helplessness or hopelessness about your medical condition.)
• Find a doctor who will work WITH you. Your doctor should be willing and able to discuss your condition clearly, and support you in educating yourself and your loved ones about fibromyalgia and available treatment options.
• Ask reasonable questions, and require reasonable answers. A doctor may have all the medical knowledge in the world, but if s/he can’t or won’t answer your questions or listen to your concerns, chances are that you will be disappointed with the results. A good doctor will listen closely to your medical concerns, and will ask (and answer) reasonable questions.
• Consider more than one doctor. Maybe you’re one of the lucky few who already had a great doctor when you became ill, but most patients have to reach outside their comfort zones to find a doctor who is very familiar with FM and its treatments. If possible, you may want to consider specialists in areas more likely to see many FM patients, such as rheumatology, neurology, or endocrinology.
• Ask for referrals. If you know someone who can recommend a good doctor, especially if you share symptoms in common, that is usually as good a place as any to start your search. Even if they can’t help you, they may at least be able to refer you to a fellow doctor who can. Never be afraid to ask a doctor for a referral (or a second opinion). If you don’t know anyone who can recommend a doctor, do some research on the internet and find a specialist near you. If you don’t know where to start, you can contact organizations like the Fibromyalgia Network for help.
  
• Consider your budget, but don’t let it stop you. No matter how wealthy you are (or aren’t), you are liable to end up paying more than you would like for medical care, treatments, prescriptions, etc. Financial hardship is a common experience among FM patients, but it shouldn’t stop you from continuing to search for the right doctor. Remember that the right doctor will help you to maximize your health and quality of life, and may even be a key in helping you maintain or return to work. In the long run, your health is worth the financial investment.
• Be wary of clinics. Specialty clinics which focus primarily on FM and similar conditions do exist, but they are NOT all equal. Most of them will make an effort to help you manage your symptoms, but many will not accept insurance and some will soak up all of your financial resources before you have really found the best treatment or combination of treatments for you, and then stop treatment altogether when you can’t afford to continue. Don’t set yourself up for failure by trusting them just because of their name; be as cautious as you would with any independent doctor.
• Go beyond your insurance. Chances are good that if you are like most Americans today, you are under-insured or uninsured. If you are fortunate enough to have health insurance, it makes financial sense to work within your network as much as possible. But if you have exhausted your in-network options and are not satisfied with the results, consider going outside of your network. Many doctors will consult with you on an as-needed basis, recommend a treatment, or perform tests which can then be brought back to an in-network doctor for follow up. If it is what you need to get healthy, it is worth the extra cost. If you don’t have health insurance, it may take you longer to find a good doctor whom you can afford, but you can still find one and you shouldn’t give up looking until you do.
• Be patient. If you don’t find a doctor who understands what you’re going through and helps you find the most effective treatment for you the first time out, you’re not alone. Keep looking. Many patients see five or ten or more doctors over a period of years before they find the right one. But once they do, they realize the search was worth it.
  
• Give it some time… Doctors are people too, and sometimes they have bad days. In fact, they seem to have more bad days when they’re handling a disorder as complicated and poorly researched as fibromyalgia - so unless you leave the office feeling violated or completely dismissed, attend a few appointments before you make a final judgment on their ability to help, especially if they’re within your price range. Some doctors even respond better if their first suggestion doesn’t seem to “cure” your symptoms immediately, and take it as a personal challenge to get you feeling better.
• …But don’t waste your time. Once you have determined that, for whatever reason, a certain doctor is not meeting your needs, move on. There are thousands of other doctors, and even if you have to travel a little further or pay a little more to find the right one for you, there’s not much point in continuing to see someone who has nothing more to offer you. Don’t make the mistake of getting into a power struggle or a helpless cycle with a doctor who isn’t helping, it is a waste of your precious energy (and money).